Shared Custody Agreement: What Parents Need to Know
Jun 15
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Jenifer Marks, Esq.
Shared Custody Agreement: What Parents Need to Know
The term "shared custody" generally refers to an arrangement where both parents remain actively involved in raising their children. Depending on the state, shared custody may include shared parenting time, shared decision-making, or both.
While many parents focus on how much time each parent receives, understanding how a shared custody agreement works involves much more than simply dividing days on a calendar. It involves putting the best interests of your child first.
Shared custody can mean a true 50/50 arrangement, with parenting time, holidays, and vacations divided equally between parents. However, shared custody does not always mean that every day is split exactly in half. Every family is different, and the best schedule for one child may not be the best schedule for another.
Even when parents share parenting time equally, there are many ways to structure that time. Some families use week-on/week-off schedules, while others prefer 2-2-3 schedules, 2-2-5-5 schedules, or even arrangements where the children spend extended periods of time with each parent. Shared custody schedules can be customized around a child's age, school schedule, extracurricular activities, and the parents' work commitments.
We explore these options in more detail throughout this article and in our FREE class, Parenting Plans & Custody Agreements.
What Is a Shared Custody Agreement?
A shared custody agreement is a written agreement that outlines how parents will share responsibilities for their children after separation or divorce.
A shared custody agreement should address:
- Parenting time schedules
- Residential schedules
- Holidays and school breaks
- Vacations
- Decision-making authority
- Communication between parents
- Transportation responsibilities
- Dispute resolution procedures
The goal is to create clear expectations and reduce future conflict. We discuss how to write a clear term in our FREE class, Parenting Plans & Custody Agreements.
Does Shared Custody Have to Mean 50/50 Residential Time?
Short Answer: No.
One of the most common misconceptions is that a shared custody agreement automatically means a perfect 50/50 split of parenting time. In reality, shared custody arrangements come in many forms.
Some families use:
- One overnight per week and every-other-weekend
- Every-other-weekend schedules
- Five days every other week
- School-year/summer-break schedules - Other customized schedules based on work, school, travel, or the child's unique needs
The best schedule is often the one that works for the child and serves the child's best interests, not necessarily the one that divides time exactly in half.
In most states, courts make custody decisions using a "best interests of the child" standard. While the factors vary by state, the focus is generally on promoting a child's health, safety, welfare, stability, and overall well-being. The concept has become the dominant standard in American custody law and remains the primary framework courts use when evaluating parenting arrangements.
In Class 1: Parenting Plans & Custody Agreements, we discuss how clear parenting plan language can help parents reduce conflict, avoid ambiguity, and create stronger custody agreements. Start FREE today!
Shared Decision-Making Matters Too
A shared custody agreement is not just about where a child sleeps. Parents should also consider how major decisions will be made regarding:
- Education
- Medical care
- Mental health treatment
- Religious upbringing
- Extracurricular activities
These are just a few of the important issues that should be addressed in a custody agreement. Many custody disputes arise because parents focus heavily on parenting time while failing to address decision-making responsibilities.
A well-written parenting plan helps parents understand who makes decisions, how disagreements will be resolved, and what happens when parents cannot agree. The more clearly these issues are addressed, the less opportunity there is for future conflict. The Minnesota courts do a nice job explaining the difference between physical custody and legal custody in basic terms.
For a more in-depth understanding of decision-making check out our FREE class, Parenting Plans & Custody Agreements.
A Good Shared Custody Agreement Includes a Strong Dispute Resolution Provision
Even the best co-parents will disagree from time to time. A well-written shared custody agreement should include a dispute resolution provision that outlines how disagreements will be handled before parents find themselves back in court.
Common dispute resolution options include:
- Direct communication between parents
- Mediation
- Parenting coordination
- Consultation with a mutually agreed professional
- Arbitration
The dispute resolution process you choose matters. The cost of resolving a disagreement can vary dramatically depending on whether parents communicate directly, hire a mediator, use a parenting coordinator, pursue arbitration, or file motions with the court. A well-structured dispute resolution provision can save parents hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars in future conflict resolution costs.
A strong dispute resolution provision can also require parents to attempt certain resolution methods before seeking court intervention. This creates clear expectations between the parties and eliminates confusion about what steps must be taken when a disagreement arises.
Rather than asking, "What happens if we disagree?" years later, a good parenting plan answers that question from the beginning.
In our FREE class, Parenting Plans & Custody Agreements, we discuss dispute resolution provisions and other parenting plan terms designed to reduce conflict and avoid costly future litigation.
